Birthdays. That day of the year when you enter people’s minds whom you’ve long not heard from, when people smile at you and wish you a great day or when your friends and family are even kinder to you and tell you how great it is that you are in their life. It is a great time, you get attention and love, presents and good wishes! You celebrate, have a fun time and make the day your own!
Who doesn’t like their birthday?
Well, there are a few people who prefer not to be celebrated, but most often we are happier on our birthday. Of course! Because it is our day.
Remember?
The day when you were born and saw the sunlight - it blinded you because it was a new experience for your eyes - the day when you took your first breath - don’t forget you coughed first because your lungs were filled with fluid you needed to clear - the day when you first let the world hear your voice by crying up - or it was just so cold and uncomfortable compared to your mothers womb that you needed to complain yet you didn’t know any words.
Being born is a big change! Everything you’ve known for about 9 months had to be left behind. Everything you’ve ever experienced and learnt in your mum’s womb seemed not enough to handle what the new circumstances required.
I wish I could recall how I felt! I wish I could recall all the memories of the first moment I saw this world!
How did it feel? My first breath, when I experienced the light, the temperature, how my body felt and what emotions I experienced.
What did it feel like when I stopped crying? Was I suddenly ok with all the new in my world or was I just too tired to keep on crying? Was it being close to my mum that calmed me down and put me to sleep? The food from her breast that nurtured my body to start the growth?
I don’t know. I don’t remember. But I’m pretty sure it was not all comfort, fluff and rainbows. I’ve never given birth, I’ve never seen anyone giving birth, the closest I’ve been is hearing people simulating giving birth - I’m an actor, right?
It does not sound fun!
Yet after it’s done we celebrate it. We celebrate a day that is full of struggles, cries and screams, pain and suffering. Also a day that is full of beauty filled with opportunities for the future, that creates new realities in everyones life. Not only yours, your family’s, your future friends’, but the whole world’s!
With every drop of tear falling down your face when you are a new baby in this world, there is more water in the fountain of life. Tears that come from fear of the unknown, discomfort, being cold and hungry, being unsure wether it’s the right place to be because sure you were so comfy before and now it’s all gone!!!
Those tears are actually the sign of new opportunities, new futures, new possibilities. I mean the list is endless.
And then we grow up. We celebrate this day for ourselves to remind ourselves that we survived the past however many years.
(Let me add here, let’s not forget to celebrate the mums, because they are awesome to go through all the hassle and instead of resenting us they love us more than any other human being on this planet. Maybe even more than we love ourselves!)
And now looking ahead as opposed to behind remember this: every time you feel lost, you feel fear of the unknown and you have to cry because you have no answers to the questions that life threw at you, you are being born! A new version of you, a version that stepped out of the comfort zone and took the challenges life had to offer and not hide in the corner to stay with the comfortable and refuse the change. A version of yourself that might be frightened now, but is able to embrace those opportunities ahead and thrive higher than ever, grow bigger than ever and be stronger than ever.
We have more than one births in our life. There are countless opportunities ahead of us and it is our decision whether we want to embrace them or step back. Whether we want to take the challenge or stay in the comfy place of the known. There is no right or wrong how many times you choose to be born! Sometimes it is your decision and it seems easier, sometimes life kind of just forces you… The results are the same though.You enter a new life, a new reality.Â
And while doing that, remember this: if you could get where you are now, despite how little and fragile you were X years ago, no matter what challenges life throws at you, you CAN DEAL WITH IT.
Being born is a miracle, we all kind of agree on that.Â
Sure, it’s not all beautiful and fluffy. Though this should not be holding you back but preparing you for what to expect. So the challenges will not be a surprise, they simply become part of the process.
Remember that:
It’s ok to cry.
It’s ok to feel unsafe.
It’s ok to not know all the answers.
It’s ok to feel the cold on your skin and just crave for a warm blanket.
It’s ok to want to have someone next to you saying it’s going to be all ok.
It’s ok to not feel ok.
It’s ok, because the next step in the process is learning. Learning to walk, learnIng to talk and a bunch of other things. So you expand, you experience fun, you experience love, you get in contact with the world and through that you get in contact with other people including yourself. A deeper self. A self that then becomes your best friend and helps you through this process again and again.
So wherever you are right now, whichever date your birthday is, happy birthday! You may not remember the very first one, but I’m sure you will remember those moments in your life when you went through hardships and felt lost. Thos are your birthdays too! And there is many more to come. When they are here, don’t resist them, celebrate them! Because those times are the game changers. Those times are the ones that make you who you are.
Happy birthday to you all!
Photo by Terrance Raper on Unsplash